.Borrowed Thoughts.

Never…ever…again.

The word itself makes me want to violently throw up. Unless you have ever actually been the ‘other woman’ in a situation – there is little you can do to understand how hard and painful it is. What it does to your sense of self, and your view on love. You are key witness to lies, and deceit within a loving relationship. You, as the mistress, the dirty little secret – will seldom ever be viewed in any kind of positive light whatsoever. You will be judged far more harshly than the husband, the wife, the gf/bf that is doing the cheating. How can any self respecting woman be with someone who is taken after all? Home-wrecker, wh*re, manipulator, b*tch, disgusting pathetic filth, etc. It’s all been said and heard. Unless you are made of steel, it starts to take it’s toll.

Let me tell you what it is like to be in love and waiting… To feel your heart lodged in your throat every single day.

(more…)

Love is not love
Which alters when it alteration finds,
Or bends with the remover to remove:
O no! it is an ever-fixed mark
That looks on tempests and is never shaken;

It is the star to every wandering bark,
Whose Worth’s unknown, although his height be taken.
Love’s not Time’s fool, though rosy lips and cheeks
Within his bending sickle’s compass come;
Love alters not with his brief hours and weeks,
But bears it out even to the edge of doom:
If this be error and upon me proved,
I never writ, nor no man ever loved. ” – Sonnet 116 (Shakespeare)

Costanza – I’ve Been Waiting for You (mp3)

My wounds are still breathing
Fading away
I”ve been waiting for you to save my world…

Sexy song in that L-Wordish kind of way ;)

One of my most favorite songs… First version I ever heard wasn’t the original Rolling Stones (which admittedly, I don’t like much), yet the Sundays cover and  I instantly became obsessed. This rendition is really beautiful (not sure why she changed some of the lyrics though)- I get chills towards the middle/end – so give it some time.

I watched you suffer a dull, aching pain
Now you’ve decided to show me the same
No sweeping exits or offstage lines
Can make me feel bitter or treat you unkind

Wild horses couldn’t drag me away

I know I dreamed you a sin and a lie
I have my freedom but I don’t have much time
Faith has been broken, tears must be cried
So let’s do some living after we die

Wild horses couldn’t drag me away
Wild, wild horses, we’ll ride them someday…

The Sundays – Wild Horses (Mp3)

You know… I may not be much of a writer ;) … Words escape me easily. I don’t claim I can write poetry – nor would I ever attempt to. I can’t put together a sonnet, or present you a provocative soliloquy of my innermost thoughts. I am unable to paint a picture, or create music that inspires.

… But I think that’s OK. When love is powerful, genuine, and intense, any other vehicle of that expression besides the physical and spiritual is an added bonus. Sometimes, even unnecessary if it doesn’t come natural to the person expressing it.

The songs that two hearts in sync sing, the paintings they paint, and the poetry they write is more beautiful than any other art form. Often, all that is needed is silence, a glance, and a touch. The love screams from within – speaking a language unique to those two sharing in that moment.

The rest is just noise.

…and this coming from a rambler ;)

This song is so slow…it is good for a quiet “silent” moment…

Antony & The Johnsons: Mysteries Of Love

Antony & The Johnsons – Mysteries of Love (Mp3)

Sometimes
A wind blows
And you and I
Float
In love
And kiss forever
In a darkness
And the mysteries of love
Come clear
And dance
In light
In you
In me
And show

That we
Are Love

Sounds suicidal but the lyrics are beautiful…

Vast – Flames.

One of the best love making songs… ever.

Vast- Flames (Mp3)

Close your eyes
Let me touch you now.
Let me give you something that is real.
Close the door
Leave your fears behind
Let me give you what you’re giving me…

You are the only thing
That makes me want to live at all

When I am with you
There’s no reason to pretend
That when I am with you I feel flames again…

Just put me inside you
I would never ever leave
Just put me inside you
I would never ever leave
you…

Daniela Urzi; God what a gorgeous first name she has huh!?

I thought I’d take a break from being all dramatic, pouring my heart, emotions out and treat you to some delicious eye-candy. Now, it is really rare for me to find a woman beautiful (I usually only do if I have feelings)…but I stumbled across this model from Argentina- and just thought she was really attractive.I usually prefer a more ethnic/exotic look but I don’t know…there’s something about her… I think it’s the lips… I still won’t say she is beautiful because that is reserved for those who are special to me ;)

Anyway…Enjoy

She reminds me of Gia Carangi…

Some music for your listening pleasure as I don’t feel like a post is complete without some sounds.

I put my iTunes on shuffle and just picked whatever it landed on. I LOVEEEEEEE this song so…I’m happy. I remember I was working out and running and this came on, and I started listening to the words (which I never really did before) and I started crying. Uh oh…This entry wasn’t supposed to be emotional…Bye.

The Veils: Sit Down By The Fire

The Veils- Sit Down By The Fire (mp3)

I been waiting in line
now I know I’ll never
Overcome this madness
If I don’t know for sure

Across the water she clings to me
and in the light of dawn
I see her at my side

Over my head my heart and my feet
I’m drawn insane
You know I need you now…

One of my most favorite [love] songs… This is Cat Power covering Nina Simone’s version of Wild Is The Wind.

It is definitely my most preferred rendition:

Cat Power – Wild Is The Wind (mp3)

You touched me, I hear the sound
of mandolins. You kissed me,
With your kiss my life begins…

Like a leaf clings to a tree,
Baby, please, cling to me.

Love me, love me. Say you do.
Let me fly away with you…

So beautifully represents the hunger for, almost obsession with that person you so completely and absolutely love… Someone that nobody else could ever compare to… It is beautiful, passionate yet there is a sad undertone, almost as if the singer is pleading with their lover to hang on… Or at least that is my interpretation…

We are all full of weakness and errors; let us mutually pardon each other our follies
–Voltaire

Earlier today I was speaking to someone at length about the power and complexity of forgiveness. When I really love somebody, it is easy for me to forgive them. It is something many friends of mine don’t quite understand completely because I will forgive pretty much anything. I think there are a mixture of reasons as to why…

First — I simply don’t get angry easily and when I do — it never lasts very long. Secondly, if I love someone — and I mean really love them with all of my heart – it is impossible for me to stop. There is this threshold, this specific point – and once someone meets and surpasses it – they are held in my heart forever. If they do something extremely hurtful to me — I will be crushed, and severely disappointed. I become disillusioned and start making up excuses for them in my head so that they won’t fall too far off the pedestal I placed them upon. I then remind myself it wasn’t ever safe to hold them so highly to begin with because, after all, no one is perfect. I may get angry, but again, this doesn’t last very long because all the love in my heart overpowers anything else. If they are genuinely sorry for what they have done — I am over it completely. If they never apologize — yet I know they are sorry because I *feel* it  — I will get over it as well.

Maybe it is more so my own defense mechanism because nothing feels worse than the disappointment in someone you care for, but whatever it is — it helps me to move forward, not judge, and be able to still think of that person fondly. I think it is important to forgive, because holding onto negative energy does no good anyway. When you are able to forgive someone – it means the love you have is genuine, and everlasting. To forgive, and love without being forgiven in return, is to love selflessly without expectation.

(more…)

I crave your mouth, your voice, your hair.
Silent and starving, I prowl through the streets.
Bread does not nourish me, dawn disrupts me, all day
I hunt for the liquid measure of your steps.

I hunger for your sleek laugh,
your hands the color of a savage harvest,
hunger for the pale stones of your fingernails,
I want to eat your skin like a whole almond.

I want to eat the sunbeam flaring in your lovely body,
the sovereign nose of your arrogant face,
I want to eat the fleeting shade of your lashes,

and I pace around hungry, sniffing the twilight,
hunting for you, for your hot heart,
like a puma in the barrens of Quitratue.

-Sonnet XI, Pablo Neruda

So…every time I am amongst friends and we have a few drinks the inevitable happens and we begin talking about sex, our turn-ons, turn-offs, etc. While we all may be into different things — one topic where I always seem to be left alone is on the topic of blood. Nothing to me is sexier than to be so raw with animalistic passion, to want to devour every single savory inch of your lover, including the essence of what keeps them alive…the blood flowing through their veins. Fingernails digging in/scratching the skin, a bite that may be a little too hard resulting in the trickling* of the blood that is now on my lips, my tongue, then swallowed straight inside to the core of me… very erotic…

(more…)

This song made my entire body tingle and chest swell…it’s that sexy ;)

If you don’t agree, then we wouldn’t make very good lovers…

Makes me want to be in a place like… Italy… having a few glasses of wine with the love of my life…and enjoying sheer bliss together

Ahh..

Haunting, beautiful, sensual vocals…transports me and gets my imagination going…as you can see.

Enjoy

Blue Foundation – Shine (mp3)

I’m so sorry
This melancholy
Holds me down

But luckily
You are so dear to me
In your charity
I go home